More Koolaid, Please

Home with nothing to do, I started cleaning my room and going through things that I haven't looked at in a while. On the shelf at the top of my closet, there is a box. A box I have been long afraid to re-open. In it? Memories. Reminders of something specific that I put in a safe place in order to not accidentally stumble upon them.

A decent chunk of time from my life is preserved in that box. Pictures, online conversations, jewelry, and even a few things whose significance I can't for the life of me remember.

It made my night to look through it, which is a response I never expected.

Not because I miss it, or because I still long to go back. But because I am thankful for all of it. Without all of those feelings, now stored carefully in a shoebox, I would not be me. I would be someone completely different, and probably someone much worse. I am content and happy now, and I wouldn't be here if I hadn't made a few mistakes. Regret is a tricky subject. But why regret something you cannot change? Whatever you did, at that time, was exactly what you wanted. People change, and so do their needs and wants, and that is nothing to be ashamed of. You can look back and be embarrassed of the person you were many years ago, but still remember how far you've come since. And do your best to be someone who won't embarrass you five or ten years down the road.

I just have to say, you are simply the most ridiculas person that I know. You might not read this, and if you do you may not know it's you. But anyway. I thank you for that.