Wednesday, January 05, 2005
Time to vent a little
And just a warning, this entry will contain a total overshare (Maybe only in the opinions of some, though). Yeah, that's right. Just thought I'd let you know it advance.
Today hasn't been the best day to be a girl.
I hate society and it's evil influences.
I feel like Huck Finn, at the moment. Those of you lucky enough to participate in a typical Landretti discussion should know why, when I say that I know what's right and what matters, yet, all around me, society sends messages that completely contradict what's true and important.
I got my eyebrows waxed today for the first time ever, and it hurt like hell. Yes, maybe I'm a wimp, but I only got it done because it seemed like what everyone else was doing to be more attractive, and hey, why not join in on the fun? So I did it, and it was so painful, and my eyes watered like crazy and got all puffy, and it's now four hours later and the redness has yet to disappear. Ah, the suffering and paranoia. Also, I was unable to go out in public (into society, oh, how it passes judgement!) for fear of humiliation. And I wanted to see Matt and eat cake, damnit.
Alright, now for what I warned you about. Chest size doesn't matter. But then why DOES it matter?? No sense was made right there, I know, but there is an example of how society and my inner feelings/knowledge aren't exactly the same. So here's the story. With almost every girl attending Junior Girls, or any other occassion that requires a dress of any sort, there is pretty much always a bra dilema. What will show where, what will/won't fall off, etc. I am no exception, and I thought I had conquered this dilema, but tonight as I tried on my dress for the 18th time, there it was, staring me in the face. This is when I'm supposed to say to myself, "Self, those who matter don't care, and those who care don't matter. And I do say that to myself, however, myself says right back to me, "But you're a girl, don't deny that there's a problem here, because you don't have nearly what EVERYONE else has to show off." Well, self, not EVERYONE has so much more than I do. But it feels like that, because the male half of society, and a majority of the female half, are constantly breathing down my neck about how important it is to have huge boobs and flaunt them. I can't help it, just like every other girl out there, so I don't see why it's necessary for them to be such a huge deal. I probably wouldn't be saying that if my situation were a little different, but still, I know a few rather busty women who are totally creeped out by the attention they get only because of their chests. So jeeze, let's stop staring, OK?! Yeah, I know you won't. But I just had to say it. Now, please excuse me while I take the next 2.5 days to prepare myself to be completely ignored because I'm flat. (That's taking it a little far, and I'm only dressing to impress one out of the 320 attendants, but what is society screaming at me, if not THAT? Jeeze. Just stop yelling at me, stupid society. )
Argh. I think that if everyone on earth was a girl for one day, none of this would be a problem anymore. Because that way, all men would know the pain and agony and pressure and nonsense that we face each and every day, simply because we're female. Once again, today just hasn't been the best day to be a girl.
In other news, I am very glad that Becky has been found. Whew, that was a close one.
Only one more day of school, and then Junior Girls festivities begin. Hooray for that.
Goodnight, and may tomorrow be better.
Today hasn't been the best day to be a girl.
I hate society and it's evil influences.
I feel like Huck Finn, at the moment. Those of you lucky enough to participate in a typical Landretti discussion should know why, when I say that I know what's right and what matters, yet, all around me, society sends messages that completely contradict what's true and important.
I got my eyebrows waxed today for the first time ever, and it hurt like hell. Yes, maybe I'm a wimp, but I only got it done because it seemed like what everyone else was doing to be more attractive, and hey, why not join in on the fun? So I did it, and it was so painful, and my eyes watered like crazy and got all puffy, and it's now four hours later and the redness has yet to disappear. Ah, the suffering and paranoia. Also, I was unable to go out in public (into society, oh, how it passes judgement!) for fear of humiliation. And I wanted to see Matt and eat cake, damnit.
Alright, now for what I warned you about. Chest size doesn't matter. But then why DOES it matter?? No sense was made right there, I know, but there is an example of how society and my inner feelings/knowledge aren't exactly the same. So here's the story. With almost every girl attending Junior Girls, or any other occassion that requires a dress of any sort, there is pretty much always a bra dilema. What will show where, what will/won't fall off, etc. I am no exception, and I thought I had conquered this dilema, but tonight as I tried on my dress for the 18th time, there it was, staring me in the face. This is when I'm supposed to say to myself, "Self, those who matter don't care, and those who care don't matter. And I do say that to myself, however, myself says right back to me, "But you're a girl, don't deny that there's a problem here, because you don't have nearly what EVERYONE else has to show off." Well, self, not EVERYONE has so much more than I do. But it feels like that, because the male half of society, and a majority of the female half, are constantly breathing down my neck about how important it is to have huge boobs and flaunt them. I can't help it, just like every other girl out there, so I don't see why it's necessary for them to be such a huge deal. I probably wouldn't be saying that if my situation were a little different, but still, I know a few rather busty women who are totally creeped out by the attention they get only because of their chests. So jeeze, let's stop staring, OK?! Yeah, I know you won't. But I just had to say it. Now, please excuse me while I take the next 2.5 days to prepare myself to be completely ignored because I'm flat. (That's taking it a little far, and I'm only dressing to impress one out of the 320 attendants, but what is society screaming at me, if not THAT? Jeeze. Just stop yelling at me, stupid society. )
Argh. I think that if everyone on earth was a girl for one day, none of this would be a problem anymore. Because that way, all men would know the pain and agony and pressure and nonsense that we face each and every day, simply because we're female. Once again, today just hasn't been the best day to be a girl.
In other news, I am very glad that Becky has been found. Whew, that was a close one.
Only one more day of school, and then Junior Girls festivities begin. Hooray for that.
Goodnight, and may tomorrow be better.
# posted by Allisoni Balloni : 8:15 PM
Comments:
<< Home
Huck FInn is a HORRIBLE book. However, i think it's something all high school kids have to go through one time or another. The musical about it, "Big River", is fantastic though. It's a good story, but just SO slow. Wait until the end when Mark Twain seems to go crazy. haha.
Yes, being a girl does really suck sometimes. Though, I think girls impose it on themselves. I fall victim myself to being girly and doing silly things to look good. It makes my brothers laugh. Really though, it's fun to be able to change you're appearance. It's more work, but we have way more options with that sort of thing than guys do. Society can be a real bitch. Or, just the way men treat us. It never seems fair that women can't walk down a street at night safely, or really walk much of anywhere without having creepy men call at us. yick. Who would possibly want attention from creepy men??
Allison, at least you get to wear a pretty dress and you'll look great! Getting ready is like half the fun. hehe. I hope your eyebrows are better.
Yes, being a girl does really suck sometimes. Though, I think girls impose it on themselves. I fall victim myself to being girly and doing silly things to look good. It makes my brothers laugh. Really though, it's fun to be able to change you're appearance. It's more work, but we have way more options with that sort of thing than guys do. Society can be a real bitch. Or, just the way men treat us. It never seems fair that women can't walk down a street at night safely, or really walk much of anywhere without having creepy men call at us. yick. Who would possibly want attention from creepy men??
Allison, at least you get to wear a pretty dress and you'll look great! Getting ready is like half the fun. hehe. I hope your eyebrows are better.
I'm a guy, and i don't think it is that important to have big boobs. Big boobs can be ugly, and a turn-off. What really counts is how nice the person is. If you really care about a girl it doesn't matter what her boobs look like. I'm not saying it isn't a little extra plus if her chest is nicly proportional to her splendid looking body: it's like the little bonus toy you find in a box of cerial. I would rather date a girl with little boobs than with boobs too big for her body, but looks don't determine who you are as much as your actions.
Post a Comment
# posted by 
: 7:54 PM
: 7:54 PMSubscribe to Post Comments [Atom]
<< Home
Subscribe to Posts [Atom]
